I was sent this video link today, and it's worth sharing.

It's called The Name Game. And it's about two people who meet for the first time and the conversation that ensues.

The topic of asking questions invariably comes up in a diversity workshop. Curiosity is a human condition. And we get to know each other by asking questions. I'm not a fan of political correctness, because it keeps the barriers up, rather than helping us to connect. However, we have to see more in this situation.
  
It's hard to explain to people who are White and "don't have an accent" that the types of questions Canadian immigrants (and probably US immigrants) and visible minorities get repeatedly are not just about wanting to know.  
  
Think about it: When was the last time you asked someone white "where are you from" or  someone without an accent "what's your background".  Or if you are White and don't have an accent, the last time someone asked these questions of you?
  
Interesting isn't it?
  
They happen because we are the "Other". Still. And with that comes the ingrained, often unconscious sense of entitlement by the questioner to be able to ask questions that they would not dream of asking someone who wasn't "different". Power dynamics in our society perpetuate this and keep us from examining it closely.

Questions are appropriate in context. When we are getting to know someone, when we are building a relationships (work, personal, intimate), but  like this video suggests, often these questions are asked when meeting someone for the first time.

If this happened to everyone, we wouldn't be having this conversation - maybe we'd be examining cultural social skills, I don't know. But it doesn't happen to everyone.  These types of questions happen to people who (incredulously, given our population) still look "different" and sound "different".

Still. Despite a growing visible minority population that will soon make visible minorities the visible majority (I wonder if we will change the term?), and the fact that we are all immigrants in North America, unless we are Aboriginal or First Nations People.
 
Watch the video.
   
Notice what comes up - the feelings, the discomfort, the justification.
And then think about it. Again.

See more.

Annemarie
© Annemarie Shrouder 2010
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