I attended the Pride Community Advisory Panel (CAP) consultation with Racialized communities at the 519 Community Centre last night, and I can’t shake the frustration.

There is so much wrong with this situation.

This CAP was not commissioned by Pride Toronto. They are a group of community members and allies committed to hearing the communities’ voices and helping to create change. This is amazing, and they are doing good work. However, organizational change has to happen from within. The people inside have to be up for it – recognize that it’s needed, want to change. I’m not seeing much evidence of that, and this worries me. The CAP was formed outside of Pride Toronto, and Pride Toronto agreed. I would argue that they agreed because their back was against a wall. The last 8 months have not been pretty. Rightly so, there were many questions raised in the room last night about where this will go, if our input will be heard, and what happens next.  Beyond the report and the recommendations – then what?  It’s a good question – but I have to say that I think it’s a question we should be asking ourselves and our communities, not Pride Toronto.

As I listened to many people speak passionately and thoughtfully about the history of disrespect, lack of engagement, and disregard that Pride Toronto has shown Racialized communities and community organizations, a few things strike me.

First, there is such a long history. This is not a new problem. This concern did not rise up this year. There is a traceable history with Blockorama and Blackness Yes and many community organizations that have seen their place at Pride go from (literally) within the centre to the margins. Obviously Pride Toronto doesn’t “get it”. 

Secondly, Pride Toronto has grown from a grass-roots, community-based organization based on resistance and struggle for rights to a corporate entity. This means that money is the bottom line. Getting it - and getting more next time. This is a red flag; there is no room for community engagement when you have sponsors to worry about. 

When you combine corporate mentality with the history of disrespect and disregard, why are we surprised that no one is listening? That no one cares? That the voices that spoke up in the Spring are still speaking, after more of the same occurred again this past Pride?

Let’s not forget that (although we don’t like to talk about it) systemic racism is woven into the fabric of our country. Add that to the mix and our worries about “will this round of talks make a difference” is an even bigger question mark. 

That’s plenty to make me angry, but here is the thing that has me particularly upset: When will we say “enough”?

We are strong people and a strong community. And we know what we want. I sat in the room, listening to calls for justice, understanding, humility, apology, and to make it right. And something nagged at me. The anger boiled up and I thought, why are we still here? Stamping our feet and talking about all the wrong that has been done and what we would like to see to repair it – when it’s been going on for years!  In April at the meeting with Pride Toronto about Blockorama, the theme was “the fire this time”. That fire is fueling the passion at these talks, but I hope that’s not all.

Marginalized groups are the ones who fight for change. I understand this. We are the ones affected and we fight to make things better for ourselves and others. Part of this is raising awareness about what is wrong, because if it doesn’t affect you, if you don’t feel it, then sometimes you can’t see it and you need some help. So we speak up. Sometimes we have allies. Often it works. But there are many effective ways to create change, and I can’t help but wonder how long we are going to rattle this cage until the people inside “get it”.

We know what we want. We are very clear about what Pride means to us, and that Pride Toronto is not living up to that. We are clear that we – the community - are Pride; that Pride is ours. Why does it feel like we are asking (and waiting) for recognition from an entity that is not representing us, and seems like it could care less about us, instead of breaking out and creating the change we want to see?

Last night's meeting was a good forum (if you missed it, or any of the other 5, check out www.communityadvisorypanel.ca and send in your thoughts)  I have confidence that our voices were heard and that our concerns will be reflected in the recommendations to Pride.
And then what?
What happens if there is no significant change, or hint of movement towards it?
What does "the fire this time" look like then?



 

 

 

 

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Ah yes, Jason Akermanis....

I'm a little behind the news, I admit, but I have to comment on Jason Akermanis' column.

Having  just read the column in the Herald, a few things stand out.

Firstly, he is right in suggesting that coming out as an athlete presents some different challenges. We've seen the evidence in the low numbers and in the published accounts of those that have (Mark Tewksburyand his book Inside Out comes to mind). While we have made strides in the workplace, a team locker room is not the same environment. Obviously.

Secondly he suggests that the sport is not ready for it. Given his column, if his feelings represent those of footballers, then he is probably correct. Sadly.

But more than this, what struck me most is the homophobia inherent in his column. The discomfort in the locker room pales in comparison to the discomfort of spending your life hiding (and often hating) who you really are because of fear due to homophobia. 

I'm so tired of everything gay being linked to sex. Sexual orientation is ONE part of a human being's identity. We all have a sexual orientation. Straight people are not attracted to everyone of the opposite sex that they meet, nor are they scoping everyone out. Neither are gays and lesbians. Get over it.

If shower time is uncomfortable in the locker room, it's because  of the homophobic crap people have been taught and learned over the years and the unfounded fear of others that ensues.

It's time to take a good look at the problem - homophobia - rather than continuing to blame gays and lesbians for simply wanting the right to be who we are out loud.

See more.

Annemarie Shrouder
Speaker, Thought Provoker
© Annemarie Shrouder 2010
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